Stop Breathe and Read

It's been a busy busy past few months. I've been in the hospital doing volunteer work at the emergency room. I've learned a lot and at the same time got depressed a lot. That's coz with learning comes mistakes and with mistakes comes getting yelled at. Man, those times sure get my self esteem so low, I imagine it being on negative if it were on a scale.

Anyway, June's hit the calendar and so has the nimbus clouds, cold winds and rain showers. Yeah, rainy season it is. it'll be a challenge commuting to work. i hope i'm still clean when i get to the hospital. No mud splashes please!

So I've done 2 months of volunteer work and I became really close with the staff. A party was set and I was allowed to go already but some things just had to ruin my moment with the staff. A family outing was set on the same date as the party with the staff. What's the use of arguing? I'm made to choose between people I just met and family members who I won't be seeing in years (since the one concerned is leaving the country and won't be back for like half a decade).

I'm pissed I have to miss the party with friends who I get along with really well. Add the fact that I got yelled at last duty for clarifying something. Tsk. I feel so stupid.

Alas, I could not cry along with the weather so I grabbed The Pilgrims of Rayne (Pendragon) and started reading last night. Amazing how the story made me forget about the stuff i was fussing about earlier. What made me stop reading though was the fact that I was already sleepy and the last few words I read just sent chills down my spine that I thought if I read on and fall asleep I might get nightmares. It wasn't gruesome. I'll find out tonight.

It's my day off today yet I have no one to go out with. Friends are no where in sight and possibly busy. Sigh. Another lonely mall day I guess. Bills and window shopping. Oh dear friends, let's have coffee some time.